Stay. I want them to stay. If even its for a little while longer, just a moment longer maybe, but I want them to stay. I do want them to stay forever in my life but everyone comes and everyone goes.
I guess its because everyone has a time to make an entry into our lives and the time comes for them to leave, they must do so.
It breaks me, most of the times.
Today, my sister woke up before me and made sure I get ready for office. She wanted me to leave a little later because I used to leave 15 minutes prior to my actual departure time, and I did leave today 15 minutes later than my usual time giving me the exact amount of time needed for mg travel to my new office.
I am seated on my bus, on my way to work as I type this in my word doc I have on my phone and remembered that moment in time. How funny it was that my sister wanted me to leave late and apparently things happened such that I did leave a little later than when I was supposed to.
When I was a child (like child kinda child, not adult-child; i was literally 10 years old or something) I used to sit on the floor with my crossed legs capturing my Dads’ legs telling him to not go to office. I was a child then, but somewhere I was afraid too I think. People whom I love, leave. Always.
And it hurts, and I want that to stop, but it ain’t gonna stop soon.
I just want them to stay, even if its for a little while longer.. I do want them to stay. If I could I’d probably hide them away from the mean world that is out there to get them.
I guess I am being a little selfish huh? Or maybe if you look at it from my lens you’d just understand that I am looking for ways to not be alone again to not be left out again, to be included in fun activities normal people do and pretend that I love staying at home while the wanderlusty version of me wants to dress up for dates or gear up for a hike or try a new restaurant.
I have become much a Homebody whilst no one knows who much I yearn to be around with people, doing fun things, getting to know each other and their thoughts and their perspectives on things that matter like Life, After Life, Space, Evolution, Advancements in tech and so on and so forth.
Maybe I just wanna get rid of this lonely feeling I feel once in a while.
I do not know that yet for sure though.
Anyways, till the next time
Be awesome
And don't forget to smile
Your partly lonely writer
R.K.
24.06.2020
11.40 hrs IST
