random rants #1

 It's 10.33, I'm listening to Khalasi from youtube, the weather is cloudy with a chance of showers around 12 pm and I'm married, sitting on the bed wondering, "How do I utilize my time today?"

This feeling visits me often... all the time on the world doesn't seem enough to do the work I need to accomplish - the home, the job search, the PHD research proposal, the Diploma in Cancer Bio course, the Pedigree chart workbook!

So much to do, so less time!

Maybe I can start working faster.

Maybe I can start working at a proper place that's not a bedroom

Maybe... there must be a way to break this cycle...

It's too guilt-trippy.

this laptop soesn't charge properly damn it!

my stuff are messy, the head, the thoughts, #struggling with clarity.

im turning 28 in 2 weeks. fml.

sequences and consequences

I'm a lot of things. 

Smart, beautiful, funny, creative.

But I'm also lazy, procrastinator, easy going. 

And then what happens when I lack discipline at the time of need?

Adverse effects. A cascade of unhappy events.

This was bound to happen.

Never have I ever:

• Been in trouble because I followed rules
• Given others trouble by being on time
• Gotten into trouble because I had a regime and a discipline for myself.

You know, there's a famous physics law - the 3rd law of motion, that states 

"every action has an equal and opposite reaction"

I wish someone had told me this is true for life too.

Every Action and Inaction taken / done / made - has a specific consequence - that also ripples with tidal effects.

And recently, my life has full of it.

Every action I made has an effect on 3 immediate people who are either associated with the task or near me.

And every inaction that goes away unnoticed and untended to leaves an impression lasting for life - just that, we won't know it now. It's always taking it's time... the snowball rolls slowly (or so we think, but let's be real, everything - everything falls with the same acceleration due to gravity)

and then - everything that's good or bad falls - maybe out of place or in place and this clouds our minds to chaos and disorder.

And that's when we got to do a few things:

* breath. slow down.

* trace your steps as what went wrong and when (throw in a 'why' to justify and feel less guilty xP )

* deal with those emotions - mostly, just sit with them. let them flow, welcome them, watch them, and don't react to it, respond rather. let them leave in peace 

* plan your next steps

* chart out sequences and consequences of the actions you're yet to take.

* try to be prepared for every curveball life throws at you

* keep space for uncertainty and uncountable factors

and lastly,

* TAKE ACTION WITHIN ITS DUE TIME.

Respect time before it loses its respect for you.

The solution to GATE-BT-2017 // Q52

A DNA strand of 25 nm wraps diametrically around the circumference of a spherical histone-octamer once. The radius of the histone-octamer = ____

[Use pi = 3.14]

ANSWER:

Given: 3.90 - 4.10

Answer calculated: 3.95 nm

Steps:

1. 25 nm wraps once = it covers the perimeter of a 'circle that coincides with the sphere's diameter'

Thus, 25 nm = perimeter = 2r(pi) or pi x D,

2. Perimeter is pi x D = 25

Therefore,

    D = 25 / 3.14

    D = 7.9 nm

3. Find the radius from D like a school child :)

because D = 2R

Therefore, R = D/2 = 7.9 nm / 2 = 3.95 nm

R = 3.95 nm.

My answer matches with the answer key, so I think this does well to the question.

If I am wrong, do let me know in the comments below.

You can also let me know what other GATE BT / XL or CSIR - LS you'd like to see me solve!

Byee.

Stop, please. Stay.

Stay. I want them to stay. If even its for a little while longer, just a moment longer maybe, but I want them to stay. I do want them to stay forever in my life but everyone comes and everyone goes.

I guess its because everyone has a time to make an entry into our lives and the time comes for them to leave, they must do so.

It breaks me, most of the times.

Today, my sister woke up before me and made sure I get ready for office. She wanted me to leave a little later because I used to leave 15 minutes prior to my actual departure time, and I did leave today 15 minutes later than my usual time giving me the exact amount of time needed for mg travel to my new office.

I am seated on my bus, on my way to work as I type this in my word doc I have on my phone and remembered that moment in time. How funny it was that my sister wanted me to leave late and apparently things happened such that I did leave a little later than when I was supposed to.

When I was a child (like child kinda child, not adult-child; i was literally 10 years old or something) I used to sit on the floor with my crossed legs capturing my Dads’ legs telling him to not go to office. I was a child then, but somewhere I was afraid too I think. People whom I love, leave. Always.

And it hurts, and I want that to stop, but it ain’t gonna stop soon.

I just want them to stay, even if its for a little while longer.. I do want them to stay. If I could I’d probably hide them away from the mean world that is out there to get them.

I guess I am being a little selfish huh? Or maybe if you look at it from my lens you’d just understand that I am looking for ways to not be alone again to not be left out again, to be included in fun activities normal people do and pretend that I love staying at home while the wanderlusty version of me wants to dress up for dates or gear up for a hike or try a new restaurant. 

I have become much a Homebody whilst no one knows how much I yearn to be around with people, doing fun things, getting to know each other and their thoughts and their perspectives on things that matter like Life, After Life, Space, Evolution, Advancements in tech and so on and so forth.

Maybe I just wanna get rid of this lonely feeling I feel once in a while.